Walking through the Saint Jamais, struggling to keep up with our small group of nine, I wanted to enjoy my time in Paris, but I felt rushed. It felt like we were zooming by each place, unable to fully absorb each landmark. Despite being in the land of slow living, we brought our hustle culture from the United States. In fear of being left behind and left out, I moved by short legs as fast as I could. Eventually, taking videos on my camera and getting stuck behind a signal light led me to being a block behind. I could feel the panic rising within me, but I decided not to catch up. I decided to take my time absorbing what was around me, going at my own pace. Maybe this was what being a Flâneur was all about. Getting a little lost and left behind, and losing your destination.

When Marius left his grandfather to live at his own pace, he acquired characteristics of a Flâneur. Living day to day, watching society drift by him, with no real destination. He wanders around with no real purpose. He minimalizes his life, spending the bare minimum and selling his belongings in order to eat. Rejecting his grandfather's wealth and political convictions, he goes off the grid. He’s drifting, ideologically, kind of like how a Flâneur would never use a map. More importantly, he becomes an observer detached from society. This is especially true when he views Cosette in the Luxembourg gardens. He sees her from a distance and he doesn’t even speak to her. Marius observes her aura and the cadence of her walk and becomes entranced by Cosette. Despite this anonymity eventually turning into love, at the moment he was acting like a Flaneur, never acting on the emotional attachment.

That day I decided to live a little like Marius. Starting off, I put myself on a budget of $20, which became 17 euros. I thought the budget was quite generous until I spent 30 minutes at the supermarket trying to come up with something suitable for me to consume with my remaining budget of 4 euros. Luckily I was able to stick within my budget, when I bought a baguette sandwich for 3,39 euros. I was proud of myself.

Medici Fountain at the Luxembourg Gardens

More importantly, when we were at the Luxembourg gardens, instead of rushing to follow the group, I decided to hold back a little, and be left behind. It didn’t mean that was unsafe and forgotten like my brain was telling me. I could enjoy my own presence. I was surrounded by a million other people, but I was by myself. I read the ending of my romantasy book and journaled for a little while. I started studying the people around me. Tourists taking photos, students on their computers, and a woman scrolling through her phone. I felt like the main character, Marius, but I also felt like I was just a background actor of a million different people.

This scene reminded me of where Cosette and Marius met. They were each other’s background actors until they were each other’s main characters. As I continued to read my romantasy book, I felt awed and struck by the grandiose statements of love similar to that of Marius. It was fast breakable love. The instalove that I wonder if it’s even longlasting. Is it just an obsession or an actual genuine companionship between the two? Regardless, Marius never really interacted with Cosette until much later. He viewed her with interest, but his lack of action proves his Flâneur-like behavior. Just wandering around without a map, looking at interesting people.

After I finished reading my book at the Medici Fountain à Jardin du Luxembourg, I walked around aimlessly. I stopped to buy that baguette sandwich and then I found myself at the Seine River. For Marius the Seine river was a time of despair after losing Cosette. It reminded me again of how instalove can be toxic. Companionship love is steady and not filled with the ups and downs like Victor Hugo describes it. Despite the drama, I was just here to enjoy my baguette and people watch, like a Flâneur. I ate my baguette, watched the people beside me reading books, the other group of girls talking loudly. They were definitely from the same place I was…

As I sat there, I began to realize that being a Flâneur isn’t about passivity or laziness, it’s about redefining slowness. It’s about choosing to notice a world, instead of blazing past it. Maybe that’s why it felt so shocking to hear one should reclaim their time, instead of optimizing it. Being a Flâneur is not easy. It means resisting the pressure to finish like 20 things in one day, sit down and work for hours. It’s about living. It’s about breathing. It’s about looking.

Marius didn’t find meaning in status and money. I mean he left his rich grandfather to marry Cosette. Instead, he rooted his years in observation, eventually leading to his discovery of love.

I saw the tourist cruise, the snickers wrapper floating, the soft wave of the water. Noticing all the small details around me, I realized maybe being a Flâneur means to be present. Present in the little things around you. It makes me feel like the things I give too much responsibility in my head actually aren’t as important as I make them out to be. When you’re surrounded by a million people, but you’re just by yourself, you get the feeling you belong while maintaining your autonomy. I never understood this until I was sitting in front of the buzzing popular tourist destinations by myself.